Beef - What's for Dinner?

If Chili's wasn't your style, maybe a fresh Fuddruckers hamburger is more your pace. Well Doha has a Fudd's too... and a group of us tried it out for lunch today. At 12:00 noon when we arrived, there was 1 car in the parking lot - which is never a good sign when it comes to restaurants, but we had already committed and I was too curious to turn back.

We were greeted by a Filipino (hence why learning Arabic is not as important as one might think) who sat us at a table and took our order - the first Fudd's inconsistency. Everyone knows half the fun of Fudd's is standing in a really long line and getting to make up a fake name that they call out over the loud speaker... "your buns are ready". 2nd inconsistency, instead of the typical musty/damp smell, there was in its place incense - LOTS OF IT... it smelled like the basement of my college dormitory.

3rd and most disappointing inconsistency, no kid's menu - so my $3.96 hamburger, fries, cookie, and coke will have to wait until my return to Houston. Instead I picked out a 1/2 pound burger and focused on how to use the warm cup of sugarwater to sweeten my full glass of iced tea.

It was at this point that the British guys who had come with us walked down to the condiment bar, which is a carbon copy of the one in every Fuddruckers since San Antonio in 1980 - down to the nacho cheese. They came back with little side plates of lettuce, tomato, corn, and salsa and indicated "the salad bar is free if you guys want to grab a bit before we eat"... I kindly nodded and indicated that my 1/2 pound burger should be enough to get me to dinner.

A few more incense sticks later our meals arrived. My first thought was that the waiter had incorrectly ordered me a turkey burger - but I soon discovered that burgers in Doha are made with Australian beef and using Muslim butchering standards, giving it a grayish color. I quickly covered my patty with lettuce, ketchup, and mustard before placing the distinct Fudd's bun on top and taking my first bite... thankfully I was hungry and the burger was well cooked. I now realize why everyone else at the table ordered chicken sandwiches.

A side note - radio in Doha is limited to 1 fulltime English station, 97.5fm that plays inspirational talk music in the mornings and non-stop news in the evenings. The alternative, 96.5 plays decent French music in the mornings, and fluctuates between English and American DJs during the drive home... which as I mentioned yesterday can be upwards of a half an hour - so I purchased an fm modulator for my iPod at the local Carrefour (aka France's Walmart) - that combined with a few days of practice have made driving in Doha seem much more like a video game. The secret is apparently to clear your mind of the inherent danger of the maneuvers you're using and to enjoy the exhilaration of the chase. Roundabouts bring out the instinctive Project Gotham 3 in all of us...